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Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Speech by Thomas Friedman of The New York Times...

 

" When we were young kids growing up in America, we were told to eat
our vegetables at dinner and not leave them. Mothers said, 'think of the
starving children in India and finish the dinner.' And now I tell my
children: 'Finish your maths homework. Think of the children in India
who would make you starve, if you don't."

 

  

Bin Laden : American Connection

A. Chandra Sen-babu's letter to the Railway Department



A Chandra Sen wrote this letter to the Sahibganj divisional railway
office in 1909. It is on display at the Railway Museum in New Delhi. It was
also reproduced under the caption *Travelers' Tales*" in the Far Eastern
Economic Review.


"I am arrive by passenger train Ahmedpur station and my belly is too much
swelling with jackfruit. I am therefore went to privy. Just I doing the
nuisance that guard making whistle blow for train to go off and I am running
with lotah in one hand and dhoti in the next when I am fall over and expose
all my shocking to man and female women on platform. I am got leaved at
Ahmedpur station.


This too much bad, if passenger go to make dung that dam guard not wait
train five minutes for him. I am therefore pray your honor to make big fine
on that guard for public sake. Otherwise I am making big report to papers."


Any guesses why this letter was of historic
value?...... ......... ......... .......

It apparently led to introduction of
toilets in trains.

 

Read in the Sing-Song tone of Chinese - Root of all problems


 
Root of  problem: The chinese name - Annie Wan (Anyone)


Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan? (anyone)

Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.


Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!


Operator: You are talking to someone! Who is this?


Caller: I'm Sam Wan (someone) And I need to talk to Annie Wan!  It's urgent.


Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about ?


Caller: Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noel Wan (no one) was involved in an accident. Noel Wan got injured and now Noel Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now,  Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.


Operator: Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't  have time for this!


Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?


Operator: I'm Saw Lee. (sorry)


Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!! 

GURU KAUN ?

 One Night 4 College Students Were Playing Till Late Night And Didnt Study For The Test Which Was Scheduled For The Next Day.

In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as   dirty and weird with grease and dirt. They then went up to the Dean and
said that they had gone out to a wedding last night and on their return   the tyre of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way
back and that they were in no condition to appear for the test. 

  
So the Dean said they can have the re-test after 3 days. They thanked   him and said they will be ready by that time.
On the third day they appeared before the Dean. The Dean said that as   this was a Special Condition Test, All four were required to sit in
separate classrooms for the test.   They all agreed as they had prepared well in the last 3 days.

The Test consisted of 2 questions with the total of 100 Marks.

Q.1. Your Name.........................( 2 MARKS )  

Q.2. Which tyre burst   ?...............( 98 MARKS )

a) Front Left
b) Front Right
c) Back Left
d) Back Right .....!!!

True story from IIT Bombay...Batch 1992-96

 

W I F E-----I bet many people can relate 2 this.....

 
 

 

Here is a girl, who is as much educated as you are;

Who is earning almost as much as you do;

One, who has dreams and aspirations just as you have because she is as

human as you are;

One, who has never entered the kitchen in her life just like you or your

Sister haven't, as she was busy in studies and competing in a system that

gives no special concession to girls for their culinary achievements

 

One, who has lived and loved her parents & brothers & sisters, almost as

much as you do for 20-25 years of her life;

 

One, who has bravely agreed to leave behind all that, her home, people who

love her, to adopt your home, your family, your ways and even your family

name

 

One, who is somehow expected to be a master-chef from day #1, while you

sleep oblivious to her predicament in her new circumstances, environment

and that kitchen

 

One, who is expected to make the tea, first thing in the morning and cook

food at the end of the day, even if she is as tired as you are, maybe more,

and yet never ever expected to complain; to be a servant, a cook, a mother,

a wife, even if she doesn't want to; and is learning just like you are as

to what you want from her; and is clumsy and sloppy at times and knows that

you won't like it if she is too demanding, or if she learns faster than

you;

 

One, who has her own set of friends, and that includes boys and even men at

her workplace too, those, who she knows from school days and yet is willing

to put all that on the back-burners to avoid your irrational jealousy,

unnecessary competition and your inherent insecurities;

Yes, she can drink and dance just as well as you can, but won't, simply

because you won't like it, even though you say otherwise

 

One, who can be late from work once in a while when deadlines, just like

yours, are to be met;

 

One, who is doing her level best and wants to make this most important

relationship in her entire life a grand success, if you just help her some

and trust her;

 

One, who just wants one thing from you, as you are the only one she knows

in your entire house - your unstinted support, your sensitivities and most

importantly - your understanding, or love, if you may call it.

 

But not many guys understand this...

 

Well... Give it a thought now!!

 

You MIGHT be a Malayali..........

You MIGHT be a Malayali..........

If you can fit four passengers in  the front seat of an  Ambassador taxi,
while in the back  there are eight passengers and two children  with their
heads stuck out of the window,  chances are,  you are a Mallu going to
attend your cousin's wedding.

If you can run, ride a 100 cc motorbike without wearing a helmet, and play football , all while wearing  a lungi tied halfmast, Malayali  status!

If you have more than 5 relatives working in Dufaiii,  Big Time Malayali..

If you have  the words "Chinchu Mol + Jinchu Mol" written on the rear
window of your Omni car, Yes, You ARE a Malaayli.

If you refer to your husband as kettiyon; ithiyan, pillerude appan,
guess what? You're a Central Travancore Christian Malayali.

If you have a Tamilian parked in front of your house every Sunday,
ironing your clothes, chances are a you are a Middle Class Malayali.

If you have more than three employee trade unions at your place of work
then ask no further, you are indeed a Malayali.

If you religiously buy a lottery ticket every week, then You're in the
Malayali Zone!

If you describe a woman as "charrakku " Yep! Malayali.!

If you constantly refer to banana as "benana" or pizza as  "pissa" you're a Malayali..

If you use coconut oil  instead of  refined vegetable oil and can't figure
out why people in your family have congenital heart problems,  you might be a Malayali.

If you are going out to see a movie at the local theater with your wifey
wearing all the gold jewellery gifted to her by her parents, you are a
newly married Malayali..

If you and your wife and three children dress up in your Sunday best and  go out to have Malabar biriyani at Kayikka's on a 100 cc Bajaj mobike, you an upwardly   mobile Malayali from Cochin .

If your idea of haute cuisine is kappa and meen curry, then, yes, you are
a Malayali..

If you have puttu
– kadala for breakfast, beef olathu for lunch, and beef
curry with "borotta"  for dinner, yeah, definitely Malalyali.

If your name Wilson , and your wife's name is Baby, and you name your
daughter Wilby, have no doubts at all , you are a standard Malayali.

If most of the houses on your block are painted puke yellow, fluorescent green, and bright pink, definitely Malappuram Malayali.

If you tie a towel around your head and burst into a raucous rendition of
the song "Kuttanaden Punjayile"  after having three glasses of toddy, then you are a   hardcore Malayali.

If  you call appetizers served with alcoholic beverages as "touchings" then
you are one  helluva Malayali.

If you're sick and your wifey rubs "Bicks" into your nostrils and gives you "kurumulaku rasam" with chakkara, (grandma's recipe) to help relieve your symptoms, Damn!! You're Malayali.


IF YOU DON'T NEED ANY EXPLANATIONS FOR ANY OF THE ABOVE, YOU

KNOW THAT YOU ARE THE REAL McCOY, A BLUE BLOOD MALAYALI.  LAAL SALAAM.

All meant in fun, don't get all "SIMBLY AGITATED" and pass   it on so another Malayali can laff too.

Ennu Swandam mattoru Malayali

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